microsoft


12
Oct 10

Windows Phone 7 has its day

Can Windows Phone 7 really carve out a piece of the smartphone market? Can it save Ballmer’s job? Unknown. But it has given me a couple days’ worth of blog fodder, and that’s the important thing.

Some random thoughts from yesterday’s WP7 launch event:

Getting the press. The WP7 launch coverage was surprisingly low-key. By evening, the front pages of CNN, NY Times and MSNBC had no top-level story about Ballmer’s event. A bit of a contrast from the front-page headlines and photos Apple gets for its launches.

A different kind of phone. Those are the words with which Ballmer began his presentation of WP7. Lame. Google “a different kind of” and you get over 20,000,000 results. Maybe the phrase is more unique on Bing.

Was the writer on vacation? Following those opening words came something far more horrifying. The WP7 overview: Always delightful … wonderfully mine. Following the launch, perhaps they can sell the line to Chanel No. 5.

Missing the memo. Apparently Microsoft didn’t notice that Apple was slammed for three years over iPhone’s lack of copy-and-paste. With all of its software skills, Microsoft couldn’t get copy-and-paste into its 1.0 product? Coming “some time in 2011.” Stunning.

Multitasking. Gee, look at that. No multitasking either. When “pressed” by Engadget, WP7 head Joe Belfiore wouldn’t say when multitasking was coming. Which leads one to believe it’s even farther off than cut-and-paste.

Flash. Et tu, Microsoft? No Flash in WP7. Not even Silverlight. Add that to the list of future enhancements. I’m not hearing a lot of complaining about this. In fact, you really have to search the reviews to find any mention of the lack of Flash. Bias!

Verizon MIA. Welcome to the good ship AT&T, Microsoft, where you will find Apple as your fellow passenger. True, there’s a plan to expand to multiple carriers by next year, but early adopters face the same sad choice that iPhone users face: AT&T or AT&T.

The Microsoft App Store. Oops, there isn’t one. But there will be. Current status: “working with developers.” The idea of being one of the first on a new platform will appeal to some developers. Most, however, are already deciding between two big, established money-makers — iPhone and Android — or spreading out their resources to support two platforms. Adding a third to the mix? That’s one very large hump to get over.

The TV spot. The final version of the ad appeared on launch day. Definitely more polished than the one I commented on last week. View the finished spot here. Again, I congratulate the creatives on a nicely done commercial. Fun to watch. Much better ending now. Strategically, however, I stand by my initial reaction. People are absorbed in their smartphones because they can use them for a zillion different things, and go as deep as they wish to go. That’s easy to laugh at, but it’s not a negative. Good news for WP7 users: with the lack of any real app library, you’ll be able to get in and out of a WP7 phone real fast.

The message. The commercial now ends with the line, “Designed to get you in … and out … and back to life.” (Note to editing team: the word “designed” is totally lost in the music.) This is a valid message to those who don’t already own an iPhone or Android phone. They’re the ones who might laugh heartily at those who are so absorbed by their phones. It’s a silly message to those who already own an iPhone or Android. The ability to go as deep as they wish is the reason they love their phones, not the reason they care to ditch them.

Top secret. In an interview, one of the Microsoft people mentioned that versions of the commercial had leaked out on YouTube prior to launch. Whether you do the editing at an editing house or in an on-premises edit room, it’s hard to imagine a near-finished version of your spot “leaking out.” If it did, you’d have a really good idea of who did the leaking. In the Apple world, you’d be executed for this offense. Major scandal. In Windows-land, it doesn’t seem to be an issue. (At least publicly.) No commentary, just an observation.

WP7 by the numbers. According to Engadget, ”By specs alone, WP7 is slightly behind the edge that Android and Apple’s offerings are riding.” One would think that the company joining the revolution-in-progress would arrive with features that at least achieve parity with those driving the revolution.

Quote of the day. Joe Belfiore said in an interview with Wired: “The success of the iPhone certainly had an impact on the industry and an impact on us. And we said there were a lot of things we could do to deliver a solution that’s different from the iPhone but have some of its benefits.” Only some? Guess it’s a good idea to set reasonable goals…

Final take: Windows Phone 7 is a product that isn’t quite ready to do battle with iPhone and Android. It’s missing too many key features. It can’t make up for those features with an interface that “gets you in and out” faster. Personal opinion: Microsoft launched WP7 because they couldn’t afford not to. It had to be available for the holiday season or face certain death. With a $500 million marketing campaign and lots of partners, it gets an upgrade to uncertain death. We’ll be watching!


7
Oct 10

Microsoft suffers relapse of silliness

I have to admit, Microsoft’s latest marketing ploy has legs. Lots of ’em.

Unfortunately, they’re the kind of legs that leave you more aghast than enticed.

On the Windows Phone home page, your favorite app icons have been transformed into mini-Rockettes to demonstrate “your Windows stuff can go where you go.”

Like the alcoholic who can’t seem to stay on the wagon, Microsoft again succumbs to that irresistible urge to be silly. These repeated lapses indicate a belief that you need a “shtick” to win over an audience. Not exactly the most sophisticated take on advertising.

Only Microsoft would feel it necessary to jazz up Office with Clippy

It’s hard to say where this nonsense started, but it comes and goes throughout Microsoft’s history. Office’s Clippy character was one widely-maligned embarrassment. Another was the childish mini-Mac character who served time as the help icon in Word for Macintosh. Then came those wacky dinosaur-headed office workers. And in real life, the more recent smartphone funeral parade.

With a trail of embarrassments spanning many years and multiple agencies, one can only conclude it’s something in the water at Microsoft.

Steve Jobs once famously said: “The problem with Microsoft is, they just have no taste … I don’t mean that in a small way, I mean that in a big way.” We can safely say there’s little doubt of that anymore.

Though Steve was talking about products, taste is every bit as important in marketing. You can’t produce efforts like Microsoft’s unless good taste is muzzled or nonexistent.

Another laugh riot from the marketing minds of Microsoft

Clearly Steve Ballmer doesn’t have a passion for, or understanding of, great marketing. That’s okay. There are plenty of CEOs in the same boat, and there’s a simple solution for his problem. He must (a) accept what he lacks personally, (b) hire somebody who’s got it, and (c) give him/her full authority to make decisions. It’s the authority part that’s usually the deal-killer.

Microsoft has enough problems trying to catch up to a revolution that left them in the dust three years ago. The last thing they need right now is a marketing group with a special talent for shooting itself in the foot.


5
Oct 10

Windows Phone 7: super or superficial?

They’re bubbling with excitement in Redmond, as Microsoft prepares to release Windows Phone 7 into the wild.

Happily, we can start our own celebration early — as two commercials have already popped up on YouTube. One of which I’ve posted here.

Just in case it gets yanked (which seems to have happened to similar links already), here’s your executive summary:

In a series of clips, we see a variety of people so consumed by their phones that they are oblivious to the world around them — often with amusingly tragic results. It all builds to the ending, when Mr. Voiceover says:

It’s time for a phone … to save us from our phone. New Windows Phone. The first phone designed to bring you the stuff you need — and get you back to what matters.

What matters, of course, is the traditional family dinner we see at the end.

As always, it’s important to note that there are two ways one can react to commercials — as an innocent member of the mass market, or as the technology-obsessed types we are.

For the innocents — it’s a pretty good spot. Nicely produced. Fun soundtrack. The better commercials somehow capture a human truth, and this one does. We can all nod our heads as we see people glued to their phones. So the line It’s time for a phone to save us from our phone will resonate. It’s a nice piece of writing.

Like I said, that’s for the innocents.

For those who look one level deeper, well … it’s a spectacular display of wishful thinking.

The reason people are absorbed by their iPhones and Androids is that they’re actually getting all the stuff they’ve been craving. They’re being more productive, better informed and better entertained. The ability to do these things is the very essence of the smartphone revolution. It’s the reason why the phones that can are killing off the phones that can’t.

So, after years of watching the revolution from the sidelines, Microsoft’s big contribution is a phone that allows us to just “glance and go”? That bit of superficiality is delivered by Ms. Voiceover at the end of the second commercial.

Hate to burst their bubble, but if glancing and going is your thing, there’s an app for that. With iPhone’s 250,000 apps and Android’s 80,000 apps, you can be absorbed to whatever degree you wish.

It’s condescending for Microsoft to tell us we’re spending too much time with our phones, or suggest that we’re missing what’s really important in life. Many of us use our phones precisely to stay on top of what’s really important — including getting closer to our families.

The real problem is that Microsoft has missed what’s important in the phone market. Had they joined the fun in any meaningful way two or three years ago, they wouldn’t have to dream their way into the party today.

The odds don’t look good.

Just yesterday, the tech stocks took a beating because a Goldman Sachs analyst lowered MSFT from buy to neutral, citing “concerns about the company’s mobile-device business.” Not exactly a vote of confidence on the eve of the Windows Phone 7 launch.

So, now that the engineers have had their way with Windows Phone 7, the marketers will take over. If these commercials represent the official company line, it won’t be surprising if most consumers take one glance … and just go.

[Thanks to Nate for the tip.]


14
Sep 10

Group dementia strikes at Microsoft

Is it Photoshop? An inmate uprising? One stretches for explanations when gazing upon the unthinkable.

In this case, we must accept the truth, now documented by several sources: last week, Microsoft really did celebrate the developer release of Windows Phone 7 by staging a mock funeral for iPhone and Blackberry. (No word on Android’s fate.)

Presumably, they used the hearse left over from the Kin launch earlier this year.

Photo: Trioculus (Flickr)

It should be noted that this wasn’t the first time someone pulled the ol’ funeral shtick out of the closet. Steve Jobs performed the same stunt in 2002 by putting his own beloved Mac OS 9 in an onstage coffin to celebrate the ascension of Mac OS X.

Think about that one for a moment. Steve was putting his own product in a coffin, simply to make a dramatic point. He wasn’t sticking Windows in a coffin to proclaim its doom. Sitting there with 3% of the market share, that would have made him look ridiculous. Microsoft, with a 0% market share for its all-new Window Phone 7, has no such qualms.

But I don’t mean to make this a story about Steve Jobs vs. Microsoft. It’s really just a story about intelligence vs. stupidity.

When the world is watching, and you’re playing catch-up with the big boys, you simply don’t go out and embarrass yourself. When you get all dressed up, you think twice about putting on the clown nose.

I’m not suggesting that Microsoft employees be locked in their offices. (Well, maybe one.) A new product launch is exactly the right time to celebrate all those months of hard work. People should be excited. Dreams of success should be dancing in their heads. If I worked at Microsoft, I’d be drinking the beer and partying with the rest of them.

It’s just that normally, a grown adult approves the celebration — and prevents employees of questionable taste from giving the whole company a black eye.

Fake funeral parades, giant phone models, costumes and hearses don’t just happen by themselves. Sometime, somewhere, a Microsoft manager looked at this brainless plan and said “sure, let’s have some fun” — instead of “you’re fired for even suggesting it.”

I can only imagine how the guys over in PR must feel. They must have steam coming out of their ears. Then again, this is Microsoft. It’s possible they were out there driving the hearse.


9
Sep 10

Alert! The smartphone revolution is coming!

This just in: Microsoft is preparing a revolution in smartphones. It’s almost ready. Really.

I can only imagine the looks on their faces when they climb out of their news-proof bunker and discover that the revolution’s been going on for three years.

Does Microsoft honestly believe they can introduce Windows Phone 7 as a revolution? According to this video, yes — although (as reported by Kara Swisher at All Things Digital) it is unclear if this is their real marketing direction, or a one-time shot during a London event.

Let’s give Microsoft kudos for exuding confidence. Then let’s remind them that we’ve seen the Windows Phone 7 preview, and it isn’t exactly a revolution. It’s more like running after the train that left the station yesterday.

If they believe using the word revolution will somehow create Apple-like buzz, they’d better think twice. Everyone knows you have to use the word magic too.

If it weren’t for the laughable conclusion, I’d actually be crowing about the imagery and music in this spot. It has an elegant kind of power.

Senior citizens will recognize the desert image, soundtrack and typography from 1962′s Lawrence of Arabia. But most will probably just wonder Microsoft has been drinking — and what the heck that Arabian stuff is all about.

I’m anxious to see what happens when Windows Phone 7 actually does join the revolution-in-progress. Given the masses already in love with iPhone and Android, the market for a Windows phone may look eerily like that desert.


2
Sep 10

Apple hits the high notes

Fans of over-analysis surely enjoyed the rumors about what was going to happen at yesterday’s Apple event. Thankfully, that’s all behind us now. It’s time to start over-analyzing what really happened. Here’s my contribution:

Live streaming. Welcome back! After five years, it was good to see you again. If this was a real-world test of Apple’s new billion-dollar server farm as some speculated, I’d give it a 95% rating. The video was fantastic, except for a few glitches. Just need one little tweak in Server #11,355. (Update: See comment below. This may have been Akamai’s technology, not Apple’s.)

The Perky Factor. Haven’t seen Steve this “on” in a while. He was enthusiastic, animated and funny. That’s entertainment.

iOS 4.1. Kudos for fixing the two unforgiveables: (1) the proximity sensor, and (2) the horrid performance on iPhone 3G. Wireless printing is cool, but I’m most anxious to try out the HDR photo feature. You haven’t gotten me to leave my pocket camera at home yet.

iPod shuffle. Feels like a “do-over.” Has any new iPod ever been larger than the model it replaced? Buttons are back. Remote/earphone combo is gone. Much, much better. Apple design leads the industry, but on occasion it does lead them astray.

iPod nano. Holy cow. Home run. Out of the park. Love it to death. Apple will sell a ton of these in the holiday season. Who among us can resist the lure? Just don’t think you slipped this one by us, Apple: Last year, all your marketing was about the cool new video feature, this year you’ve removed it. We’ll let this one slide, only because it wasn’t real video anyway (not HD) and this mini-touchscreen is just too damn cool.

iPod touch. iPhone 4 set us up for this one. It’s exactly what everyone expected: Retina display, dual cameras and FaceTime. And let’s have a big hand for the A4 chip, which is now powering iPod, iPhone and iPad. Nice and snappy.

iPod prices. Our traditional deal with Apple has always been “more features, same price.” Is it my imagination, or are these prices creeping upward? Cue Darth Vader: “I am altering the deal. Pray I don’t alter it further.”

iPod ads. When a company gets big and successful, nobody wants to be the one to screw it up. So you begin to stick with things simply because “they work” — even though the younger, brasher version of yourself wouldn’t have thought twice about shaking things up. The new ads are perfectly fine. They’re just awfully familiar. In fact, the new touch ad (click in the image above and skip to 35:40) is virtually a carbon copy of the 2009 touch ad and the 2008 touch ad — except now FaceTime is added at the end.

iTunes 10. Ping is a huge, huge, huge addition. Until now, Apple has been more of a bystander in social media, and Ping puts them right in the thick of it. Or at least closer to the thick of it. Following friends’ discoveries and following your favorite artists is one of those “why didn’t they think of this before” kind of things. Perfect. I’m already signed up and horrifying my friends with my musical taste.

Zing! Bing! Ping! But can we talk about the Ping thing? Since when does Apple go with a me-too product name? Zing was an embarrassing failure for Dell. Microsoft is putting millions behind Bing at this very moment. Surely there’s a better word in that dictionary somewhere.

AppleTV. Huge step in the right direction, giving us access to Netflix, movies, TV shows, all those good things. $99 is a great price. Its tiny form is impressive, though in practical use not a terrific benefit. It’s still another box with cables sticking out of it. Question: what happens to my current AppleTV? It’s not like Apple to render a product obsolete so quickly. May I have a credit, please?

All in all: great show, Apple. Thank you for a fun and interesting afternoon. Just make sure you terrify the right people in the lead-up to the next show. Your secrets seem to be leaking more and more these days…


12
Aug 10

Microsoft goes Mac-sniping

After playing the part of punching bag in the Apple’s long-running Mac vs. PC campaign, then fighting back with a peashooter in its own I’m a PC campaign, Microsoft is on the warpath. With a new section in their website entitled PC versus Mac, they’re turning the volume all the way up to 7.

Before we pause to read, let us enjoy the accoutrements. While most web pages display a window title, Microsoft actually crams a mini-ad into that tiny space — complete with a double-dose of “more.” You can almost hear the marketing chief exhorting his troops, “Make every pixel on this page sell!”

As you can see above, the navigation area atop the main image does a perfect job of differentiating PC from Mac. It’s a mess. We get two navigation bars (awkwardly spaced), four tabs, a “Were you looking for?” pop-up and an ill-placed, barely noticeable “PC versus Mac” title. Appropriately, the woman’s face seems to be saying, “No, really, I’m glad to see you — I just didn’t have a chance to clean up.”

Well it’s August, maybe the web designers are on holiday. Let’s just skip directly to the content. Like Apple’s Why you’ll love a Mac pages, Microsoft breaks its story down into bite-size chunks. Do they pass or fail?

1. Macs might spoil your fun.
Microsoft makes a point that in the universe of PCs, you can find models that have Blu-ray, TV tuners, 3G wireless, and the ability to connect to Xbox and TV. Can’t do that on a Mac. Fair enough. Pass.

2. Macs can take time to learn.
This section boldly states, “The computer that’s easiest to use is typically the one you already know. While some may say Macs are easy, the reality is that they can come with a learning curve.” It’s been a while since I’ve seen logic as lame. This is like telling the stick-shift owner that automatic transmissions are easier, but they come with a learning curve. Of course they do. Everything in life has a learning curve. Once you learn, it might just make what’s left of your life more pleasant. Fail.

3. Macs don’t work as well at work or at school.
This isn’t just a scare tactic, it’s at odds with Microsoft’s own business. Here we are warned that it can be difficult to share files with PC users if you use Apple’s productivity suite. No mention that if you use Microsoft’s own fabulous Office for Mac, you get seamless compatibility guaranteed by Microsoft itself. Ugly fail.

4. Macs don’t like to share.
I never knew it was hard to share on a Mac until I read this. I share things instantly and effortlessly all day. Whatever setup was required was so insignificant I don’t remember it. Fail.

5. Macs might not like your PC stuff.
Here, we discover that files from Apple’s productivity suite won’t open on a PC. Hey wait a second. Didn’t they just say that? Oh, and if there is a Mac version of the software you want, you’ll have to buy it again and relearn it. Uh… buy it again, yes. Relearn it, no. Double fail for redundancy.

6. Macs don’t let you choose.
This section starts by saying “PCs give you a lot more choice and capabilities for your money.” Interestingly, they never mention the money part again, even though it’s probably their strongest argument. Instead, it’s all about Blu-ray, TV tuner (didn’t we already discuss this already too?) and all the colors you can choose from besides Apple’s white or silver (watch it pal, that’s aluminum!). Fail.

The beauty of Apple’s famous-but-now-defunct Mac vs. PC campaign was its tone of voice. With humor, it delivered a very aggressive message without making Apple sound nasty. On Apple’s website — then and now — the comparisons to PCs are presented positively (“It’s designed to be a better computer,” “It’s compatible with your stuff,” etc.). Microsoft’s tone is far less appealing — you might even say whiny and threatening.

I don’t knock Microsoft for creating these pages. They have a business, and they need to stop the growing number of defectors in their tracks. However, I will say that some artful writing would have helped. A lot.

They might have waited till the designers got back from vacation, too.